By: Arezoo Roa, Sr. Prevention & Strategic Partnerships Director
When we think about relationship violence, it’s easy to picture bruises, broken bones, or visible scars. But not all abuse leaves physical marks. One of the most devastating and most overlooked forms of abuse is financial abuse, a tactic that traps survivors in controlling and unsafe relationships.
Research shows that 94–99% of domestic violence cases involve financial abuse. This can look like restricting access to bank accounts, forbidding a partner from working, sabotaging their credit, or monitoring every dollar spent. For many survivors, the fear of not being able to support themselves or their children becomes the biggest barrier to leaving.
Grace’s story is a powerful example of how financial abuse can strip away independence. By the time she was 18, she was married and had a child. Her husband pressured her to quit her job and tracked her every move. When she resisted, the emotional and psychological abuse escalated. Grace felt trapped, believing her situation wasn’t “serious enough” to seek legal protection.
That changed when she met an advocate from Human Options, an Orange County nonprofit dedicated to ending the cycle of relationship violence. With guidance and support, Grace was able to discreetly obtain a Domestic Violence Temporary Restraining Order and a move-out order. These courageous steps not only led to her husband’s arrest but also gave Grace and her children the safety and space they desperately needed.
Through counseling, legal advocacy, and therapy, Grace began to rebuild her life. She filed for divorce, found healing for herself and her kids, and finally felt like she could breathe again.
Grace’s story is not unique. As economic pressures rise, financial dependency is being used more frequently as a weapon of control. Survivors often feel trapped between two impossible choices: staying in an abusive relationship or facing financial instability. But there is a third option: support, safety, and freedom.
At Human Options, we believe that no survivor should have to choose between safety and survival. We provide emergency shelter, counseling, legal advocacy, and resources that empower survivors to break free from abuse, whether it is physical, emotional, or financial.
If you or someone you know is experiencing abuse, know this: you are not alone, and help is available. Call our 24/7 hotline at 877-854-3594 or visit humanoptions.org to learn more about our services and resources.
Financial abuse may not leave visible scars, but its impact is life-changing. With the right support, survivors like Grace can find safety, healing, and freedom again.
